Chanel No. 5 smells like my great grandma, and other musings

A Bottle of Expensive Disappointment

Imagine being a 5'2" 14 year old girl with serious attention span issues and an interest in anything that would destroy your wallet. You're in the mall with your mom and best friend and a mission to get new hand soap, a wallet, and a cute yellow shirt you saw at Forever 21 even though you don't really like yellow. You come in through Dillard's, which, in case you didn't know (not you as me, you as yourself) is full of expensive everything, including perfumes. As you walk through, your mother mentions that a month or so before you had mentioned that one of your life goals was to smell the world's most famous perfume--Chanel No. 5. You all decide to search for it among the Dior, Givenchy, and Estee Lauder. Lo and behold, just as you are about to abandon the search in favor of buying cheaply scented foaming soap at Bath and Body Works, your mom tells you to look. Just down the counter is a display of Mlle Coco Chanel's scents, among them, of course, the jasmine-and-sandalwood holy grail of ridiculously expensive perfumes: Chanel No. 5. Elated, you spritz it onto a test card and prepare to achieve a life goal. What hits your nostrils is highly reminicent of the smell of your father's grandmother--baby powder and mothballs. You attempt to put a bold face on it and smile at your companions. "It smells expensive," you weakly offer. But that's not all it smells like. It also smells like elderly women who sit around and play cards and crochet multicolored lap warmers.

That was my (slightly less dramatic than the above retelling) experience today. What I was expecting to smell like rich French fashion icons and fulfilled dreams smelled like my great-grandmother.

I'm not the only one who thinks this way, however; a lot of people share my sentiment. I googled "chanel no 5 smells like an old lady" and there were quite a few results (none of which I really feel like posting since they just say exacly what I said.)

However, there are also many people who say stuff like this:

I have often heard people say that CHANEL No. 5 smells like an old grandma perfume, but those who say that, don’t deserve to be wearing CHANEL No. 5 in the first place. If you think it smells like an old-lady fragrance, then you obviously don’t understand it.  And to those who have never given it some time, I suggest you do as it is one of the handful of fragrances that I believe every “real” woman should wear at least once in her life.

Well, ma'am...you're probably right. I really am not the kind of person who would or should wear it. I don't "understand" it, as you say. I mean, my favorite scent is Endless Weekend from Bath and Body Works; not exactly on the same level as an over-$100 perfume.

Arbitrarily 21

 Stores have the weirdest names. Take Forever 21, for example. What does "forever 21" mean? Does it mean that you will always be 21? Then, honey, I have a news flash: it doesn't work that way. And why 21? Why not 18? Why not 22? *22 by Taylor Swift plays* Um...anyway. The majority of people who shop there are teens, anyhow; they haven't even turned 21 yet. 

Speaking of which, so many stores are named after people or at least sound like it. Kohl's, Dillard's Aeropostale, Abercrombie and Fitch, Hollister, Charlotte Russe, Maurice's, and J. C. Penney, to name a few. I guess it makes sense; if I had started a huge chain store I'd probably name it after myself. It's easier than coming up with one.

We Don't Believe What's on Your iPhone

Today, I had a conversation with my friend that got me thinking. We were talking about music and I mentioned that I was torn about my music; I wished 21 Pilots was played on the radio more, but that would mean (in my own words) "it would be mainstream, and that would be terrible." 

Why is it that people like me are so obsessed with the idea of not being mainstream? Is it because we want people to notice that we don't do things the way everyone else does so that they'll think about the pack mentality of American popular culture? Because, if that's the case, it's a pretty dumb reason, seeing as the only thing that happens when you don't like popular things is that you become an outcast. 

Is it because there's a sort of superiority you feel when you aren't like everyone else? That could make sense; it really satisfies your pride to know something that others don't.

But if it's based on pride, then should we stop being "alternative" because pride isn't a good thing? Should we choose instead to swallow our pride and feelings of superiority and embrace what everyone else does? Should we burn our record albums (which we actually listen to), stacks of books, and band shirts in favor of iPhones, Instagram, and crop tops? No, that isn't a good solution.

Honestly, I haven't thought of a good solution yet. If you do, would you leave a comment please?

Your favorite unicorn-cat,
Sophi